East Village Boys / FOUR SHADES OF BLACK

FOUR SHADES OF BLACK

01-May-08 by Weston Bingham

OK, we’ve finally decided to clue you in about our favorite East Village rocker girls, Tall Black Girls. They’re totally East Village boys, except for the girl part, so lets call them our honorary East Village Boys of the month. At any rate, they’re all tougher than our twinky intern.

EVB: Describe your sound.
Julie Black: Totally metaclassifunkrocountrygospunk, but sexy.
Nurse Kelly Black: Dirty, sexy, trashy rock.
JenCharles Black: We are most certainly a sexy, dangerous good time. Loud, driving, unforgiving. Kinda like a really good fuck with a total stranger on a hot summer night… what are you doing later… oh wait, we should wait ’til summer. I don’t mind if you bring your boyfriend.
Kate von Black: Hmmm… getting busted on the walk of shame OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN by everybody you’ve ever had a threesome with, only to find out they’re all friends and man do you look like an asshole.

EVB: What’s your take on Cock Culture?
Julie Black: I take cock… and what the fuck is “Cock Culture”?
Nurse Kelly Black: Are you askin’ if I strap it on?
JenCharles Black: My take? Well, I’ll take it anytime! Yea boys!
Kate von Black: More the merrier, bigger the better.

EVB: If you really were a tall black girl, which tall black girl would you be?
Julie Black: Nurse Kelly… or… Joan Crawford. She’s TOTALLY a tall black girl!
Nurse Kelly Black: Tina Turner - she’s the epitome of sexy, soulful, leg rock! RuPaul is a close second, ohhh yeaahhh, stilettos!
JenCharles Black: First of all, I am, and second, I guess I would have to be Kelly if I had to choose. Cuz I’ve always wondered what it would be like to be that short.
Kate von Black: Grace Jones? Tyra Banks on poppers?

EVB: What happened to your keytar player?
Julie Black: GOD, nobody ever tells the drummer anything!
Nurse Kelly Black: A semi-sad story really, we were forced to sacrifice her to Shetar Goddess of Hellfire for some cool, refreshing tequila water.
JenCharles Black: Um, you guys should really proofread these questions before you send them out, because you misspelled guitar. How embarrassing.
Kate von Black: You mean Kelly? Wait, whats a keytar?

JenCharles Black: Hey Julie, why are you such an asshole?
Julie Black: Because you are so much better than me. Hey Kelly, why are you such an asshole?
Kelly Black: Cuz u ladiEs 4 r such bitches… call u after i get my laundry [verbatim via text-message]. Who said I was an asshole, asshole! Hey Kate, why are you such an asshole?
Kate von Black: Cause I can be.

Tall Black Girls is playing Saturday May 3 at Lit, in NYC.
93 Second Ave between 5th and 6th.
10pm. $6 (cheap, of course). C’mon, that’s cheaper than a drink.